celebrating

Celebration

Celebrating and sharing good things is a very important aspect of positive relationships. Sharing good things can be done well and encourage trust and intimacy. We all know how good it feels when someone says well done, but it can feel even better when the ‘well done’ is well done!

Being positive and supportive involves responding to good news in a genuine constructive reaction that actively acknowledges the other and celebrates the event with them. Psychologist Shelly Gable has shown that this is vital to the health and well-being of all relationships but particularly builds intimacy and trust.

Do’s and don’ts of positive celebrating

Do. .

Be genuine, and excited

Mark and share the moment. Be fully present

Be fully attentive and interested in all the details

Really enjoy your friend’s or partner’s achievement

Set your own needs aside,

Don’t

Talk about yourself and your achievements

Look for bad consequences or pour cold water on it: ‘that’s great but how will you cope . . .?’

Immediately change the subject or the focus of your attention

Ignore the news or event